, Sam and Naomi Quotes

1.02 - In Which Sam Receives
Naomi:No Ginger. She can't be her. Ginger cannot be her.
Sam: Okay...you're gonna have to translate from freaked-out language to normal-people language.
Naomi:The first woman you date after me has to be...she has to--look,she cannot be somestripper with clear platform shoes and--and a suspicious skin condition.
Sam:Naomi,eventually I'm going to start dating.
Naomi: I know that.
Sam: And when that happens,you do not get to have a say in who I date.
Naomi:I know that.So...so fine,date. But it can't be Ginger.
Sam: And we're back to crazy.
Naomi:Hey,you know what? I'm a catch.I-I do "the new york times'" crossword puzzle in pen,I eat vegetables,I have a very good sense of humor,and I don't do If you date Ginger after you're with me,if she is what you are choosing, if--if your big dream is rashy-skinned strippers,then what...- what were you---
Sam:what was I doing with you?
Naomi: Yeah,you know what? Forget it.
Sam: The next girl I date will be amazing. She will be beautiful,she will be intelligent,and she will be rash free.
Naomi: She'll be better than me?
Sam: She will be way better than you. Okay?
Naomi: Okay. That's sweet. Thank you.

1.08 - In Which Cooper Finds a Port In His Storm

Naomi: God's trying to tell us something.
Sam: It's a coincidence.
Naomi: No. We... we have sex and then the day after, our priest summons us? It's the fires of hell, Sam. We had sex!
Sam: Just don't mention that we got a divorce. I don't need a lecture. Play it cool.

Naomi: Still don't think God's trying to tell us something?
Sam: You don't really think we're being punished for what we did last night?
Naomi: What, just because we may have some rare tropical, probably deadly, disease the morning after we have sex?
Sam: Well, if we are sick... I'm glad we got some.
Naomi: How sentimental.
Sam: That was a joke... I was joking.